Mar 2010

Chapter 24Balance

There was a choice to be made. A very interesting one at that. On the one hand, I was tempted to find out how Alex would taste, react or feel. To explore her to the fullest before we ever left this room. On the other hand, it was a Saturday night and the notion of an adventurous night together with my new pet was quite alluring as well. It was still early evening, the sun finally displaying some fatigue and lowering itself beyond the horizon, so there was some time. However, my kit was far away from me, and not pre-made. To get all I required, I'd have to go to my car, go home and get ready. The presence of Alex brought many options with it as well, depending on her openness. Though I doubted that would be a problem, in any way or form.

A totally different idea was to go out with her, not hunting. Just a simple introductory night for the two of us. To get to know each other better, seeing how far she could be taken. Quite far, I assumed. It was no fun to just ask her to get dressed though, after all the effort she'd gone through to take it all off. So a little inventiveness was required. Besides, it wasn't like I wanted to go out like this either. Two words were enough to get her moving, rising up elegantly from the erotic throne she'd occupied. The space between her legs still glistened somewhat, hinting at deeper desires, but she seemed concerned with nothing else than my order.

To undress me.

It was, by far, the most pleasant undressing I could ever remember. She moved around me, unzipping my skirt and letting it fall while she lifted my shirt over my body. The smell of her orgasm, her lust, was present with her every move. Wafting beneath the fabric of my clothes, sweet and seductive. She managed to lift my shirt up quite smoothly, moving around while she folded it and put it on the table. My shoes were removed one by one, together with my skirt, again neatly put away. Her pale fingers traced my slightly tanned skin from my ankles to my hips. One hand along my back was enough to undo my bra, the two of them coming together above my shoulders to slide the straps over my arms and take my bra away. Nimble fingers, sliding over my sides, hooked my panties and dragged it down, together with my socks, off my body. After the pile was completed, she stopped just shy of kissing at hip-height. Instead she waited loyally, looking up at me like a dog to her master.

Permission to kiss.

It was tempting to give it, to allow her to kiss, lick and pleasure me for a long time. But no, I had some thoughts about how this was to go. She managed to hide her disappointment well, or felt none, when I stepped backwards. With a motion of my hand I got her to rise and follow me. It was fun to see her move, the smoothness with which she could change her plans and expectations. Naked, like me, she followed me to the bathroom. I found it easily, not having to ask her for directions. Not that it was terrible to ask, but especially these first moments I wanted to lead her, to show her that I would be her mistress.

Why did it feel so right?

It was never my intention to have a servant, a slave. But there was a depth to her, an intensity of seriousness that made me adore her absolutely. And yet I knew she didn't want an owner that considered himself or herself better than her. My first time in the shower with her helped me understand why it was so nice being with her, why it felt like I could accept her as a part of my life for a while.

A balance.

It was easy to stand still, nice to enjoy her nimble hands washing my body with the fullest respect. Her soapy fingers traced the ribs on my back, swirling from side to side, almost tickling my spine. Her touches were almost divine when they curved around my shapely bottom and flowed down my legs, caressing the back of my knees, flowing over my calves and feet, connecting me to the floor. The front was given an equally erotic wash, with the palms of her hands spreading the froth all around my face, neck, breasts, stomach, hips and legs. The warm water ran down my body, cleansing me of the dirt-filled bubbles on my skin, whisking them away with veritable vigor.

It was her turn, eagerly waiting with surprise when I asked her for the soap. She stood still all nice and proper, smiling carefully while my own analyzing appendages attended to their purifying ritual on her body. Her flesh felt fantastic, so smooth and soft. Even the mark on her leg felt no different than the rest of her skin. Even the white soap, as pure as the morning snow, hardly offset her complexion. The warmth of the shower and perhaps my touches managed to make her blush perfectly. Rouge on porcelain. Her lips tasted hot and sweet after I'd washed the foam of her body, her kiss an eager response to my offering.

It is incredibly hard to explain why this felt like balance to me. She was allowed to touch me and I enjoyed it. I touched her and she felt special. We both knew this, were fully aware of it and appreciated it. There was a certain similarity between us as well; hiding from the world as we did. For me, it was the need for sex and excitement that I hid. The effort I took to keep the beast in check and well away from my career. Those in touch with my secret could not connect it to the real me. For her it was the danger of walking around master-less, available to any and every whim of strangers. To the world she was a hard worker, quiet and useful, to me she was a sparkling star, happy to have found an owner she could trust. It was a good thing she mostly took care of herself.

Sometimes all we need is a master.

Not just someone to take care of us, but someone who takes the responsibility of the moment. Someone who trusts you to do things right when asked and will not easily give up. A master that did not see a pet as a burden or lesser, but as an equal. Both sides of the same coin, spinning forever in the air.

We hugged.

This was new to me.

Of course I had held, been held and cuddled a lot of times. Usually after or before sex, just sharing the moment for a while longer. This was different. A hug was a gesture of friendship, warmth. Something that had completely passed me by in all those years, with almost no friends to my name that weren't contacts for sex. No one that had just conquered my attention completely, managed to make me hunt in a different way. Someone who could touch me without expecting more. Not without longing or desire, but without need. Such a unique feeling.

Alex was completely taken aback by my reaction to her embrace. In my eyes, sneakily trying to escape from the corner without being seen, were tears. Not big tears, not sadness. They were nothing but the surprise, awe and wonder of how such a simple gesture felt. Even while being naked, aroused and still coping with the whole ownership thing, it felt like a warm blanket around my soul. For the first time that I could remember I wasn't thinking ahead or backwards, I wasn't wondering what I should do with her. For a moment, lasting perhaps a second, I was in her arms and she was in mine. No thoughts, no facade.

A balance, worthy of a smile.

Her worries melted away instantly, replaced by happier thoughts, swiftly moving in their stead. It didn't take long to verbalize my intentions of the evening to her. I wasn't entirely sure yet if it was to be just the two of us or if we were to find someone to share our mirth. However, it was not going to be a night of blood, the kit was staying home. This thing, including the effect the hug had on me, inspired increased investigation.

While the night was not intended for murder, I still wanted to go home to dress properly and make sure that I had with me what I desired. This was a bit of a problem, as my car was nowhere near, but Alex brought the solution. She'd bring me to my car, then go back home and use public transport to get to me. It would give me plenty of time alone at home to get prepared before she got there and it would make it easy for me to take her with me if I so desired. She further promised me that she would buy wigs, contacts and some more clothing in the following week, to make sure that she could anticipate my demands.

She really was a helper.

Her plan was smoothly put into motion, me arriving home in my own car very relaxed and curious about the night that was yet to come. The sun had already chosen to hide beneath the horizon, but the lights in my bedroom were good enough to choose something better than the simple clothing I'd been wearing today. In a way this was a first, to go out with someone else for reasons that were mysteriously unclear to myself, but nevertheless very enjoyable. It was only a few minutes after I'd finished selecting the dress of the night that my mind ground to a halt a bit more.

What was I doing?

My secret had been exposed and rather than taking care of it, I reveled in it, planning to prance around town with her. Thoughts of killing her played through my head while my brush flowed through my hair, but none of those really got anywhere. There was too much curiosity, too much desire to play with her, enjoy her company and her body, to feel her as part of the adventure. Downstairs, after the bathroom quest was completed, I made myself a cup of tea, opening the cutlery drawer and playing with the large bread knife while my thoughts were still jumping all over the place. The temptation peaked just before the doorbell rang. Alex had come back. There was no longer any doubt in my mind. I was going to do it.

The knife fell back into the drawer.