Chapter 131A Mind that Wanders

Dusk woke me, but something felt very wrong. Immediately my hands clasped my head, my mind hurting so much it was almost unbearable. It was throbbing with each heartbeat until, beat after beat, it softened and became possible to think again. I heard Nuru's voice in the distance and truly had to focus to get my senses in gear again. Finally, after what felt like minutes, I could hear her clearly again.

"Miss Amy, are you alright?"

My hands were still clasped against my head, my eyes unopened. I tried to speak, my voice no more than a whisper. "I... Why is it hurting so much?"

The pain subsides gently. It faded away in mere moments. Enough for me to feel like I could try and sit up, try to get back to the world again. I opened my eyes, at least I think I did, but nothing. The world continued to stay black for me. I started to panic.

Speaking quite loudly. "Nuru! Are my eyes open?"

Her hands touched my face, it calmed me a little, but I hardly felt at ease. "Yes, Miss Amy, they're open."

"I can't see anything."

Nurus next, calmly spoken words suprised me so much, the panic vanished. "Yes, Miss Amy. I think I know why."

"Why?" I only spoke very softly.

"It's better if you feel for yourself." There was something in her voice that worried me. If only I could figure out what it was.

She moved something and helped me stand up. "Feel with your feet."

Very slowly I examined the cold floor with my feet. There was nothing special there until I felt a book with my toes. It was quite a big book, which was odd. Why was it on the floor? Nuru guided me further and I felt another book, and another on top of that one. Slowly I realized the floor was covered with book except for a small area around the bed, which Nuru had cleared.

What had happened?

"Nuru, did you do this?"

"No, Miss Amy, you did. A few hours ago, long before the sun set, it looked like you had a violent nightmare. I... I'm not sure, but it felt kinda of like all your memories came back vividly, letting you experience them all at once. The books started to fall out of the bookcases, some almost jumping out to the middle of the room. Strangely none landed on us. It only lasted for a few minutes, but by then all the books were on the ground and the desk."

"I did this?" I couldn't quite believe it.

"Yes, Miss Amy." Nurus voice was so open and honest.

So it was true. "Then why can't I see?"

She took a deep breath. "It feels like a safety mechanism. Your mind overloaded, sort of. To protect itself it shut down the most intense senses. It took almost ten minutes for you to hear me too. Vision is the most intense sense, I guess." It was almost cute to hear her thinking for once. She sounded more and more herself already.

My mind got into gear. Practical matters first. "So, too many books to clean up for now?"

"Yes, Miss Amy. But I've put a lot of them back already, as best as I could, until you were awake. Fortunately I remembered a lot of their locations from my study yesterday."

I sighed. I didn't dare to move. It was very odd being blind. From my memory I had a decent idea how the room looked, but with many books on the floor it was sure to be dangerous to walk for me. Also, the rest of the castle wasn't that well known for me either. I really didn't like the feeling of having to depend on Nuru to guide me around. It felt like asking too much off her. It wasn't fair.

But I had to ask. "Nuru, will you help me dress?"

"Yes, Miss Amy."

It was odd, feeling her hands over my body while she helped me dress. It isn't true that when you lose your sight, your other senses become stronger. You just focus on other things. I could hear her heartbeat well, but while I could discern her position from me, the distance was hard to tell. I tried to combine it with the feel of her hands, pulling my shirt over my arms. Together with the sound her feet, her breathing.

It did feel strange to be dressed by someone else, especially since I could not see if it was done correctly. But I trusted her to do it right.

"All done, Miss Amy."

It all felt familiar. The shirt, skirt and coat around me. But I was over-checking everything, still a bit confused and unsure because of my condition.

I sighed. It would have to do. "Come, we'll go to the living room."

Nuru must have nodded. "Yes, Miss Amy."

She had even fastened my shoes, they made it difficult to feel the floor. But in a way it was more comfortable this way as well. Mostly I was focused on my hearing as we walked over the books, through the corridors. I tried a few steps without her help, but the walls were always a bit off from where I expected them to be. My memory was little help as I was unprepared for all of this.

Mostly I wondered what Afentis and Faith would think.

Maybe they already knew.