Page 70Friendly hug

Today was nice. Despite not having had a full drink, I felt pretty good. My side was painless now and carrying the books back to my house was a fun thing to do. Esmeralda walked with me, she carrying four books (though the heavier ones) while I carried the rest. The store had white, unmarked plastic bags. In a day and age where almost everyone had bags that made you look like a walking ad. Having neutral bags was refreshing. At least I could reuse them.

When I walked to the house it occurred to me that I'd never seen any of the other patrons. There were six apartments there, including mine (if I went by the letterboxes), but I never saw anyone. Neither did I saw any sign of life. No letters laying around or other things moving. Of course it was possible the building was empty save for me, but it felt unlikely. Surely there were plenty of people needing a room.

It was... Interesting to let Esmeralda in my house. It was like paying her back for what she'd done for me. When I got here, she let me in her house, more or less, so now I let her into mine. She helped me put the books down and looked around.

"Is this just for you?"

I smiled. "Yes, it is."

"It's nice." She sat down on the bed, looking around. "Comfy. Oh, is that a laptop? When did you buy that?"

"I got it the night I moved in here. Internet came with the room, so it made perfect sense. It's a fairly cheap thing anyway." This was really on the edge of lying. I hoped Esmeralda wouldn't pick up on it.

"At least it looks fun. Looked at anything naughty on it?"

"No!"

She giggled. "Anyway, is that the bathroom in there?" She pointed to the door leading to the fairly obvious bathroom. The little lock indicator gave it away.

"Yeah."

"Mind if I use it?"

"Sure."

As Esmeralda walked inside and did her thing, I thought for a moment. It was amazing how long I hadn't thought about going to the toilet for so long. That's one of the few odd things that change that you don't really realize. A few gentle blessings that were easily forgotten. Especially the monthly one. I wasn't expecting Esmeralda to hold the shirt of yesterday in her hands when she came out.

With her finger poking through the hole in the side of the shirt, sounding anxious. "Amy, what happened?"

"Just an accident."

"And this?" She held the misshapen bullet in her hand.

"Part of the accident."

"It's a bullet, isn't it?"

"Yes."

"Are you alright?"

I nodded. "I am now. It just hurt very much when it happened."

For a short moment my mind cast back to the time I was burned by the sun. That had hurt a lot more than the bullet at the time and, if I did any effort, I could recall it. But somehow what's further away in the past always hurts less than what was more recent. It wasn't so bad now.

"Can I see it?"

"Fine."

I took of my backpack and lifted my shirt so she could see the hole in my side, or rather the lack of hole. It felt funny when her fingers slid over it, exploring the tiny dent in my side. It wasn't exactly pain or pleasure, or even ticklish. It was almost like some sort of spark running over my skin when she touched the edge. Somewhere between pleasant and annoying.

Esmeralda looked at me. "Will you tell me what happened."

I thought about it. "No, it's... complicated. It's not a secret, because you know it's there, but I won't explain it to you."

Esmeralda smiled kindly. "That's okay, as long as you'll allow me to be worried for a moment."

"Thank you."

"Come here you."

She dropped the shirt and gave me a really big hug, wrapping her arms around me and squeezing tight. It was the friendliest thing she'd ever done and I was grateful. For both her as a friend as well as this moment.

The rest of the night was spend in talking together, mostly sitting on the bed. Eventually, I asked Esmeralda to go. Although I was very thankful for her being there to talk to, to help me get my mind straight, I wanted to be alone. There was a final decision to take. One that I was sure would change things for me. But somehow it felt like the thing to do.

After some reading, writing in my diary and taking a short shower I decided what I was going to do for real. Though I already knew I was going to do it, just before I was writing this it felt absolutely decided.

My answer would be yes.

I would make her a vampire.

The choice to include someone else in an important part of your existence is never lightly taken.