PunfulPunishment

Here are twelve terrible game-related puns. Why twelve? Because I like to go one step beyond one step beyond.

What did the civilians yell when the Overwatch jumped on an escapee?
Guard on free man!

Why should all English people be wiped out?
Because they have the Tea-Virus.

Why did they fire the programmer at Aperture Labs?
Because he wanted to port all.

Why was Timmy allowed to make axes and swords in shop?
Because it was war-craft.

Why did they move the Smurfs to Mars?
They can't join the red faction.

Why was Rio's mother so awesome?
She was Super Ma Rio.

Why did Princess Zelda congratulate Darwin?
He found the missing Link.

Why did Samus not like the sexually ambiguous waiter?
He was the metro d`.

And why did Samus like the cook even less?
He called himself the master chef.

Why did the dying grandmother write down her dreams?
They're her final fantasies.

Why did John ask Trish to flash him as he gave her his hand-held?
Tit for tat, Trish.

Why shouldn't a nobleman have weapons of mass destruction?
Because the duke'd nuke 'm.

That makes twelve, had enough?