May 2008

Chapter 211Fragment of Being

The door opened without a sound, against my expectations it didn't creak ominously. But I had a feeling what I would find inside would scare me much more than a simple creak ever could. I stepped in...

The first thing I noticed was that the room was properly cleaned up. All the books back in their place, all in order even. My mind briefly wandered around the thought of who put them there. Probably Faith though, it was her library.

The second thing was that the desk was very clean, as in almost reflective. The only book on top of it looked twice as thick. Faith wasn't sitting there however.

Faith was sitting on the bed, my mind could no longer avoid to notice her sitting on the bed. She was sitting in odd clothes, for her at least. She looked like she just stepped out of ancient Greek with a sort of toga-like dress around her. A white fabric and nothing else. My eyes noticed that it was held together by a strip of the same white fabric tied around her waist.

She didn't really move, just look at me with a faint smile, yet something was horribly wrong. It crept up on my spine, slowly and chilling. I knew it wasn't right. The calm outside did not reflect an inner calm, rather it hid it well. I'd never seen, or felt, something like this.

"Dogs barking like cats, liquid moonshine melting her face."

I blinked, what did she mean? "Faith, are you alright?"

She smiled at me. "Little doll in the fire, suddenly there's only peaches."

I shook my head, wondering what to make of it. Was she talking about me?

"It's only a drop, only a drop. Nothing more, never more than a drop. But is it a big drop? No, it's a tiny drop. Like a snowball."

She continued to talk to me as if we were having a conversation. But I couldn't figure out what she was saying. Her words sounded as clear as if she meant to say exactly that. She wasn't mumbling or anything. Scrambled perhaps? I walked closer to her, wanting to hold her and comfort her, but I wasn't sure it would help.

Maybe it would help me.

"Don't let the marbles flow, they need their holes. Prisms and water are brothers to the light, but they fight like all family."

Another step closer. "I hope you can feel this, Faith."

Slowly I put my arms around her and felt, to my surprise, she was hugging me back. For a moment I was happy she did, but then I saw her face, with that same far-away smile. She just reacted out of reflex. Nevertheless, it felt good having her arms around me. Giving her some warmth...

She was actually quite cold.

And pale.

Releasing her I took a better look at her skin this time, noting that she really did look pale. She probably hadn't drunk any blood for days now. Though she was old and could probably be without blood much longer than I, this didn't look very good.

"Faith, when did you last drink blood?"

"The red cloak is only for the dancing, but there's no party... Why aren't I invited to a party? I want to go to a party!"

This wasn't working. Almost with tears in my eyes, I moved back to the door again, thoughts about her condition racing through my head. She really had been broken, her mind fractured and unable to stay with the moment. And probably, like Humpty Dumpty, it was very hard to put her together again.

I sighed. "I hope you'll come back, Faith."

"It's like a spoon, but it doesn't exist. Would a mirror be this beautiful? Can a mirror be beautiful or just reflect it? Is the beauty in the reflection or the eye?" Her head tilted slightly to the side, her smile waning, as if she was actually thinking on the problem.

There wasn't anything to do. I opened the door and looked back to her one last time.

Faith spoke again, her childish smile back in full. "It's not the rain they're chasing. They're just dancing to make it come to them."

Something about that sentence made me turn around. Maybe it was the word rain. Was she talking about Rain or just speaking gibberish again? Strangely enough I knew I shouldn't take any chances. But, if it meant what I think it meant.

Would Faith be speaking the truth?

I couldn't risk it, it was too important.

What should I do?